Countdown to Trumpageddon Day 2 or Payback is a female type canine.

Yeah, that is pretty much a textbook definition.

Simple Definition of hypocrisy

• : the behavior of people who do things that they tell other people not to do :
•  behavior that does not agree with what someone claims to believe or feel.

  

      All I can say is this.  You've spent the better part of a decade spreading lies, hatred and bigotry against Obama.  You have called him an illegal alien, a Muslim Terrorist, and said he was a Homosexual.  You called his wife a cross dresser.  You posted 1000s of pictures of the two of them and their children as Chimpanzees or Apes.  You called him racist names and called her names like Moo-chelle.  Those of you who didn't participate in this racist BS never spoke out against it and even found it all amusing.  You've been total pratts for 8 years and that was your right.

    However, you don't get to turn around now and say that we should respect Donald Trump because he is the new President Elect.  You say we need to respect his wife even.  You are crying foul because people are pretty much saying the same things you said for 8 years.  If it was okay for you to spew hatred and lies then you don't get to play the righteous card now.  If you wanted people to treat your leaders with respect, then you should have done the same.

     End of Rant

Countdown to Trumpageddon Day One or Is this trip really nessecary?

Countdown Begun, Activate Defcon BunnyFoofoo.

Brains...brains...dear god I am so hungry.

     The next few weeks will be fairly boring.  Sorry about that folks, but the really interesting crap won't start till Trumponce (New word, copyrighted.  If you use it, you owe me a nickel.) takes office.  The handy link at the top of the rant gives you the exact time left.  Please feel free to use it.  I mean, Trumponce being elected is kind of like all of the dolphins leaving in the classic 4th book in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy Trilogy.  How many times can you say, "Dolphins still gone" or in this case "Toupee that walks like a man elected POTUS?"  So the next few weeks of tating will be mostly about other disasters happening in the world or just random musings from your not so modest scribe,  Just sit back and relax, we'll get to the end of the world soon enough.

     I thought about doing a rant on exactly how we, as an American people, let this disaster happen.  I also considered talking about all of the really bad things that are very likely to happen once Trumponce takes office.  I even considered a piece on the hypocrisy of the Right Wingers mocking all of the people who threatened to leave the US if Trump was elected when entire states tried to secede just because a Black Man dared to be elected POTUS.  However since I am currently on vacation till Sunday, I decided to hold off on the somewhat serious stuff till next Monday.  Till then, it's just going to be random stuff that catches my attention.

A rare candid photo of Trump before his makeup.

     My early observations of the post-election hysteria is one of complete Unsurprise (Yeah I know its not a real word, sue me.) and extreme disappointment mixed with some amusement thrown in just to confuse me.  The Unsurprise comes from all of the vitriol coming from both sides with insults flying left, right, up and down.  Extreme disappointment comes from seeing people that I personally know should be above this kind of crap engaging in name calling and outright lies.  I see people who have gone on and on for years about how bad other people are resorting to the exact same thing now that the foot coverage is placed on the opposite appendage.  The instances of this happening are far to many to list here, so just let me say SHAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMME! to all of you in the first two categories.

Well, close acquaintances at best.

     Current amusements are not nearly as numerous.  My Facebook page and my Twitter account are filled with comments and insults that are better left in the 60s and all they are doing is proving how right I have been about pointing out how little we have changed in the past 50 years despite what a couple of friends like to think.  

    Among my amusements is two separate friends who are lifelong Conservative Republicans and Mormons who have posted comments before and after the election saying just how bad things will be when Trump is elected.  Folks when its so bad that people who's family has voted Republican since the Mayflower landed don't vote Republican, then its generally a good sign that things are bad,  Amusement the second, is having my Brother announce that he didn't get elected to any office (Note: He didn't run for any to begin with) and having another friend talk about how his dog, Molly didn't get elected too.  I also suffered extreme amusement when I "forced" a friend who had sworn not to make a political comment break her oath not once, but twice.  And just now, I had a FB friend who has seen my tating for years asking me ot be patient.  Anyone who has actually read this blog knows that patience ain't exactly my strong point.

     As the countdown continues, I fully expect to have fuel for more intense and snarky blogs handed to me from both sides.  Till then I hope that these filler pieces will amuse and distract you.  Keep reading for the COUNTDOWN TO TRUMPAGEDDON!  (Insert echo chamber effect here.)

End of Rant

Wait, you mean the word isn't about small fuzzy critters?

We got Trumped or "Its the end of the world as we know it."

And actually I don't feel fine at all.

I'm set, are you?

     So I pondered long and hard about exactly what this first blog would be about after Donald Trump became the President Elect for the United States of America.  I thought about some clever, snarky and extremely insulting bit with silly snips aimed at his Toupee or some wise sounding quips aimed at all of the stupid things he has said and done for the past year.  I even thought about a truly insulting rant about the lack of intelligence or common sense of the people who voted him into office.  I also pondered just putting a giant clipart image of a turd here to show exactly what I think of the whole thing.  I finally decided on the following.  I hope you enjoy it.

     

No matter how painful it may be.

     Anyone who follows me here or on Facebook and Twitter (All five of you) knows how I felt about Trump's campaign and his future presidency.  They also have a good idea about how I actually feel about the people who supported him and got him elected.  They know I'd rather have Satan Himself running the country than Trump.  (As an aside, my feelings toward Clinton were only slightly better.  If she had been running against Old Scratch, I might have been torn over my vote.)  As time moves forward, I fully expect to run hundreds of blogs about how Humping Ponce.(Not going to explain Ponce, look it up.  The effort will do you good.) is ruining the nation (BTW I hope I am wrong and they actually do a great job.  I really do.), but this blog isn't about that.

     All morning I have seen Facebook and Twitter filled with hatred and rage.  I see Trump supporters mocking Clinton supporters and I see Clinton supporters mocking Trump supporters.  I see Clinton supporters saying they will refuse to acknowledge Trump as POTUS and do everything they can to undermine his presidency.  I also see Trump supporters talking about how all the people who supported Clinton need to be shot, arrested and all sorts of evil wishes.  All I can say is, GROW UP!

     Right or wrong, good or bad and all those other sayings, the election is now over and the American People have made their decision.  I despise Trump and seriously question the intelligence of many of the people who support him, but he won.  Barring an actual Zombie Apocalypse, he will be President for the next 4 years (3 years...2 years...ever how long he is in charge till he is arrested for something.) and railing against it will solve nothing.  Screaming and ranting about how unfair things are only makes you and the country look really bad.  

     I understand the fears of all my Black/Hispanic/Women/LGBT friends with a fully Conservative Government now in control.  (Ponce is so completely anti-science that he might as well be a member of the Spanish Inquistion which of course no one would ever expect.)  I understand that they are terrified that all of the progress seen in the past 8 years will be destroyed and those fears are well founded.  However, good or bad, we live in a country where no one side can ever fully control how things go.  Democracy is about as messy and sometimes unfair to some groups as you can get.  We accept these things and we move on.  We try to learn from our mistakes and make better decisions the next time.

     I personally have enough faith in America to believe that no matter who is in charge or no matter which party is in control that we have enough checks and balances in place to keep the nation from being destroyed.  Even if Trump and the Conservatives are as a big a disaster as I believe they will be, the nation will survive the next 4 years and hopefully will learn from this horrible mistake.  I am also Tater enough to admit if if I turn out to be wrong.  If Trump and his ilk actually wind up doing a great job to make the nation better for everyone, I will happily (okay, somewhat grumpily) admit it.

     I've seen both sides saying the usual "We must set aside our differences and animosity and move forward for the best of the nation" and they are right.  The election is over, one side won and one side lost.  Nothing is going to change that.  Now we have to move forward and try to work together no matter how we feel.  Okay, honest addendum to that statement.  You all have to move forward.  Me, I'm all set for years of prewritten blogs.  Just saying.

End of Rant

I WIN, YOU LOSE or WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

     So in a little bit over a day or two, this election year insanity will finally end and whole new insanity (Hopefully more amusing) will ensue.  We will finally know who will "lead" this country for the next fourish type years.  Clinton or Trump, Trump or Clinton?  Which will it be?  Roll up!  Roll up! Place bets and pick your racer!  Do you bet on the toupee that walks like a man or the loud mouthed living pantsuit?
     I've seen a lot of tating on what will happen if either one is elected.  Common Taters from both sides of the aisle have gone on and on and on and on (well you get the idea) about the miracles or disasters that will occur if THE OTHER ONE is elected or if THE RIGHT ONE is elected.  I really believe that more has been written about this election cycle than any other since Domino's had people voting for the next specialty pizza back in the day.  If most of it wasn't digital, it'd prolly fill several landfills.
     Now I have seen all of the gloom and doom predictions by various "experts" and I suppose that no matter which candidate wins, there will be a lot of losers.  However, I am sure you all are relieved to know that, no matter who wins, at least one person will be facing a Win/Win/Win/Win situation.  That person, of course, is me.
     Now "Ass old boy, how in Dog's name can you possibly be a winner no matter who is elected?  Being rabidly anti-Trump and not too fond of Republicans in general, won't you suffer greatly under the Bipedal Cheeto's reign?"  These are great questions, I am impressed by your savvy nature.  I will now try my darndest to try to explain my oh so bright future.
     See the way I see it, there are a number of possible combinations coming out of tomorrow's attempt at democracy.  1.  (and the one I view as most likely) Hillary will win the POTUS race and Deomocrats will seize control of both House and Senate.  2.  Hillary will win POTUS but the Republicans will retain control.  3.  Trump will win POTUS and Democrats will seize control of the other places and of course 4.  Trump wins and Republicans will keep control.  4 possibilities and I personally win in all 4.
     See, as an Uncommon Tater (as opposed to the Common Taters you see in most places.  Confused?  Sound it out.  lol) my bread and butter is Politics and World News.  The weirder and wilder it gets, the easier my job is.  So no matter how you slice that bread, the next four years is pure Tating Gold.  I mean the blogs will practically write themselves.  Now one might argue this is a serious case of fiddling while Rome burned, but hey I don't live in Georgia any more so I'm in no danger.  (GET IT!?  Rome...Italy...Rome...Georgia?  See its funny because....anyway moving on.)  Lettuce look at all four of those scenarios to better grasp my glee.
    Scene One:  Clinton wins and Democrats assume the majority.  Of the four scenes, this one has the least potential for Tating.  I'll be pretty much stuck with four years of cracking on whichever states scream that they are going to secede from the Union and rag on all the people screaming that the elections were rigged and the Democrats stole the victory from Trump and the Republicans.  Mildly amusing, but really way to much work for a lazy guy like me.
     Scene Two:  This one has a little bit more potential.  If Clinton wins the POTUS seat and the Republicans their control, we will have four years of "Our number one job is to make Clinton a one term president" and Republicans blocking anything she might do, including appointing a new SCOTUS judge.  This, of course, will lead to lots and lots of Executive Actions which will lead to a whole bunch of "Empress Clinton" screams.  So we have a bit more potential for comedy.
     Scene Three:  Pretty much the same as Scene Two, just with a different side doing the screaming.  So about the same level of potential comedy.
     Scene the Fourth:  Now this one has the most potential for pure comedy gold.  You've got the Toupee that walks like a man as POTUS and a whole bunch of people who don't really like him running the rest the show.  So, there are a few different possibilities with this one.  Republicans will be forced to make an impossible decision.  They will be forced to choose between supporting a man that almost none of them like and support because...well he is a Republican and POTUS no matter how bad or insane his decisions are or use their power to make sure that he doesn't completely wreck the nation.  Either way it is a lose/lose situation because if they support him, they run the risk of not being reelected because all the Repulicans who hate Trump (and there are lot of them) get honked off and vote for someone else.  If they don't support him and work to limit the damage he does, then they run the risk of not being reelected because the people that do support Trump are honked off.  Add to that four years of Democrats screaming in terror and I can just sit back and watch the blogs write themselves.
     Sure the rest of you can fret over "If X gets elected, the Zombie Alpacalypse will destroy this nation and We'll all be forced to by government funded Undead Insurance whether we want to or not."  Some might say "IF Y is elected, then equal rights for RHLHCFs (That's Redheaded, Left Handed, Cubs Fans btw) will be set back 60 years" and yes, yes these are all perfectly valid concerns.  However since I already have Undead Insurance through MetUnlife and I am a BHRHDF (figure it out for yourselves, I can't teach you everything) I am not too concerned.
     So like I said, no matter how this disaster plays out, I win.  Four years of pure comedy gold served up to me on a lead platter.  (Lead because I am going to need it for shielding for my fallout shelter after the nuclear war.)  The rest of you might have problems, but I am good to go.  So let the cow chips fall where they may and BRING ON THE ELECTION!

End of Rant

     Last minute addendum:  If Jill Stein or anyone else manages to win, I will probably just take the next four years off cause...I got nuthin.