The Oh So Difficult and Rough Life of an Author.

     As I have mentioned before, I have been tossing out wordage since I was 16 years old and sold my first article for the grand sum of $35.00.  (Don't laugh, to a 16 year old in in 1979 in LA (Lower Alabama, 35 bucks waa a boatload of money.  At the time I got $5.00 a week in allowance to put things in perspective.)  I realized that crazy people would pay me me money for the drivel than ran through my head and I never looked back.
     So because of this decade long perspective, I can look at some of the ideas people have about the life of an Author and just shake my head.  (Paues and takes a drink from his ice cold energy drink.)  You seem to think that is is all fun and games with lots of sitting and goofing off or going to conventions to meet other authors and stars while...sitting and goofing off.  (Pauses and watches a bird fly byin the cool evening air.)  Well let me tell you that all of those things are very far from the truth.
    First of all, I have an actual job that is very demanding that takes up a great deal of my time.  I work at a fairly famous pizza place (You prolly remember commercials about avoiding something if you're OLD!) as a Delivery Driver/Assistant Manager.  This highly demanding job requires me to spend 15 to 20 hours a week riding around in my car, drinking and snacking while occassionally walking short distances to give people food.  It is a very difficult job and there are some weeks I am not sure if I can make it through the day.  I usually have to be at this arduous job by about 1730 hours so that means I must wake up no later than 1200 hours to get ready for work.  (And play World of Warcraft and watch Netflix and listen to music while playing WOW or watching Netflix.)
     On those rare days (Generally 3 or four) when I am off work,  I have so much to do around the house and in the garden that I must be out of bed at the crack of Noon to make sure that i have enogh time in the day to get everything done.  Then my day generally consists of eating lunch, preparing dinner and...well playing World of Warcraft and watching Netflix.
     Now after realizing how long and difficult my days are, you can well understand how difficult t is to find time to actually get any writing done.  I have to struggle with my oh so busy day to find the time to sit down in my comfy desk chair or even worse, sit outside in my even more comfy deck chair under the shade of my oversized deck umbrella with nice cool breezes blowing around me while sipping ice cold energy drinks.  It is a wonder I ever get anything done.  Still, I soldier on and manage.
     So the next time you are sitting at your desk after getting up at 0400 to get to work so that you can be badgered by people you don't even like about things you really don't care about, think of me and feel better about your lives.  Think of me struggling to stay awake in the warm Spring air and realize things cold get much worse.  (Finishes energy drink and ponders getting out of chair to get another, but decides the kitchen is much too far.)  PITY ME!

End of Rant