Do wanna know what is the number one thing that really HONKS ME OFF? Pandas with machine guns! The second thing that really chaffs my bunions is hypocrisy. The world of politics is full of it (Well to be precise, the whole dang world is full of it, but that would be a much longer Tate and I really don't have either the attention span or the energy to pull that one off.) and I really am getting really annoyed by all of it. That and Unsweetened Ice Tea drinkers. Really, what freaking planet are you nutters from?
So big in the news recently is rape/sexual assault/harassment. We had Brett “I LIKE BEER” Kavanaugh making his bid for the Supremes, which to me is stupid. I mean whitest dude ever trying to join a legendary Black group? I mean that is just stup...what? Oh Supreme Court! That makes much more sense. Sorry about that. Before that we had Donald “Stable Genius” Trump being accused of improper sexual conduct. Heck, before that we had Bill “There is a Sax in my pocket” Clinton with the numerous accusations of a dozen or so women. I mean, you can't swing a Mitch McConnell without hitting someone who has been accused of sexual misconduct.
Now don't get me wrong, I am not mocking the victims of sexual assault or making light of their claims. Quite the opposite, I believe that anyone whether they be Male, Female or Eggplant should be heard and taken seriously when they claim to be the victims of a sexual attack. (As a side note, I also believe that those who are accused should be considered innocent until proven guilty and treated as fairly under the law.) What I am mocking is the rampant hypocrisy that is being shown over and over again by...well pretty much everyone.
So, the most current contender for “Most inappropriate advances made in a career” Oscar is Joe “King of the Memes” Biden. He has been accused by (at last count) 3 women for making advances that “made them feel uncomfortable.” Nothing has been proven yet and old Joe deserves the benefit of the doubt until proof is found, BUT (My gawd! What a big but!) that is not what this rant is about. (You know I have spent more time telling you what this rant isn't about than I have actually saying what it is about? And yet you are still reading? Well I assume you are still reading. For all I know, you nodded off after the first paragraph or went and got coffee. If you did, make mine extra strong with heavy cream.) As per usual, both sides are up in arms over all of it and as per usual, the hypocrisy is flying higher than Dumbo after somebody mixed his hay up with marijuana. (Cannot believe I spelled that right first try.)
So, before preceding further lets recap in what I like to call A Brief History of Hypocrisy. (All due respect to Dr. Hawking.) Bill “Getting Ahead in Office” Clinton has been accused by a bakers dozen of women of rape/Sexual Assualt/inappropriate actions. Now, none of the attacks have ever been proven, but many of the accusers stories are telling. So Conservatives have pretty much condemned the man as the most evil, lecherous demon that ever walked the Earth even though there is still no hard evidence to prove he did it. Liberals, on the other hand, have pretty much ignored the accusers and even vilified them while raising Billy Boy up on a pedestal so high the man should be dead from nose bleeds.
Fast forward to Trump's push to become POTUS. Another bakers dozen of women come forward and accuse Hair Furrer of rape/sexual assault/etc. Again, no hard evidence to prove or disprove their stories. Here the hypocrisy teeter totter miraculously flips. Conservatives who believed the Clinton Accusers whole heartedly scream, “THERE'S NO PROOF! WHY DID THEY WAIT SO LONG TO COME FORWARD? THEY ARE JUST AFTER HIS MONEY! ITS ALL A PLOT!” Meanwhile, the Liberals who cried, “(Insert previous screams here)” over Clinton's accusers were now on the “WE BELIEVE THEM/HE'S EVIL!” train.
Ok we can skip over “Beer” Brett since we covered him already and move on to Meme Joe Green. (See what I did there?) So, before continuing, I do want to point out that the accusations I have seen so far (May have missed one or two so don't yell at me) against Biden definitely fall under the “Inappropriate actions” section of this rant. His actions do not sound overtly sexual to me, just the actions of a old dude from an old time doing what old dudes did. I don't say this to excuse his actions, just to point out that he (As far as I know) did not rape anyone or even “Grab them by the posse!” (That is what Trump said, right?) However, the Hypocrisy Hour Glass of Doom has turned once again.
Liberals are saying things like “Well, that is just the way things were back then” and “He didn't mean anything by doing that” and even the tried and true “If this actually happened, why did they wait so long to report it?” Conservatives are predictably going with believing the accusers and doing everything they can to destroy Biden because he may well be one of the few serious threats to the Toupee that walks like a man getting a second term.
See, here is my thing (OMIGAWD, put that away!). You can't let your moral compass be guided by your politics. If you think that the accusers in sexual assault cases should be believed no matter what, that is okay. It is not precisely fair, but it is okay. If you believe that the accused should be believed no matter what, that is also okay. Again, not fair, but okay. At least you're consistent. However if your morals flip flops with your politics, then you are a hypocritical piece of crap and that is not okay.
Because of the “why did they wait so long/just in it for money and publicity/etc” groups on both sides, actual victims of sexual assault are often too afraid or too ashamed to come forward after an attack. When no one believes them and they are mocked and ridiculed, they feel safer just keeping quiet and living with the horror and shame some animal forced upon them. It is time we started treating possible victims fairly while still protecting the possibly innocent accused. I made a lot of wise cracks and jokes in this blog, but the actual subject is not funny or a joke. It is high time we started to give the victims the help they deserve and punish the monsters so severely that it shows we care. It is also high time, we remember the truth of “Innocent until proven guilty” and protect the accused until such time as it has been proven they are monsters. I actually let the vast majority of hypocrisy go because it would be just too exhausting to cover it all, but this hypocrisy should not be ignored because either way, some innocent person is going to be hurt.
End of Rant
