And I play my TRUMP card or Just WTF were y'all thinking?

Okie dokie, as promised in the previous blog I present to you my blog on why Donald Trump, ie the Toupee that walks like a man has done more to shake people up and make even the most secure OWD (Old White Dude/Dudette) shake in their mud stained work boots. Now before I go any further, I feel I should inform those of you who have been living in a cave or under a rock for the past few years that I am not really very fond of Donnie Dumpsterfire. One might even say, that I totally loathe the man and feel that his joke of a presidency has made the US a laughingstock and has done so much damage that it will take decades to repair it all. I feel that the whole world would be better off if we locked him up in Trump Towers China and bricked in the entire building. He is one the lowest form of disgusting, perverted life on the planet, second only perhaps to Bill Clinton or maybe that weird guy down the street that collects butterflies and wears speedos. That disclaimer out of the way, let us move forward with happy, uplifting thoughts.

Now, to me, Trump is a mental conundrum. On the surface, he would seem to be the perfect icon of the Republican party. He's old, semi-white (orangish) and wealthier than Midas before the whole golden touch thing went sour. Like a huge majority of the Republican leaders and Heartthrobs (Gingrich, Limbaugh, Jones etc) he has commited multiple counts of adultery and has actually managed to cheat on every single one of his wives with the replacement wife at least once. (If you believe his bragging in his books, it's a WHOLE LOT MORE, but we can leave that at bragging and go with the confirmed ones.) He is obnoxious, Anti-LGBT and like most Republicans, he pretends to be a good Christian. So, why you may ask (and don't worry if you didn't ask because I asked for you.) isn't he the beloved poster child of the GOP?

Wait, you the possibly fictitious reader might ask again! Didn't he run on the Republican ticket? Wasn't he elected the Republican President of the US? Doesn't he have a lot of supporters who are Republican? To which I would reply with a sad shaking of my head at the lack of understanding of these invisible speakers (I take meds, I promise!) that whereas Trump does have a fairly decent level of support, especially among the “common man,” he also has a YUGE level of opposition among the higher ranking and more powerful Republicans. Powerhouses like the Koch brothers (or as I like to call them, the Penis Brothers because of how their name sounds and the fact they are real Dic...errheads.) and other wealthy powerful GOP members directly oppose him and even though his Party controls all aspects of the government, many of his own party members either directly or indirectly oppose him. So why oh why does this seemingly perfect specimen of the Decrepit Old Party scare the crap out of the?

Well, the answer is kind of simple. Despite what both the DNC and the GOP would have you believe, both sides depend on keeping the status quo as...ermm Statusy as possible. Both sides preach that the other side is evil and that only THIER ways and beliefs can possibly save the US from the evils of whatever the other side is preaching. Both sides make all sorts of wonderful noises to attract the shy and timid voters into the voting booths, but when all is said and done, neither side really wants anything to change. Because if it changed, they'd pretty much be out of jobs and possibly homeless washing windshields on the streets to pay for their divorces. Whatever numerous faults Trump has and God knows they are more numerous than grains of sand on the beach, he has done a lot to shake up that centuries old pattern.

How, you may ask? Simple, I might reply. Donald Trump is a brash, obnoxious asshole who has no pause button between what his brain thinks and what comes out of his mouth. He speaks like a 5^th grade dropout from Brooklyn walking the streets like a punk. Diplomacy is a word as foreign to him as good hairpieces and his lies are worse than the toddler telling you he didn't eat the cookies while holding a cookie in each hand and with chocolate smeared all over his face. The most common compliment I hear about Trump is “He tells it like it is.” I can agree with that statement to some degree if telling it like it is means “Lying badly in public and then lying even more badly later on to cover it up.”

Trump is pretty much the exact opposite of what a “politician” should be and it not only upsets the proverbial apple cart, but mugs the apple cart, steals all of the apples, makes pies from the apples and sells the pies back to the guy who owned the cart. He regularly gives the rank and file of both sides major headaches because he simply cannot be directed or controlled. In the world of political firearms, Trump is a blunderbuss. You can't really aim it so all you can do is point it in a very general direction and pray it doesn't explode on you before hitting your target. Good or bad, right or wrong, cake or cookie, this is why Trump has pretty much wrecked the GOP and driven the DNC nuts.

An online friend said after my last blog (Waves at John McDuffie) that the only way things would get better is if we manage to elect a legit OWD (Old White Dude) in 2020. He imagines that only a return to the status quo of the past will fix things. I personally feel we need the exact opposite. Electing a Black Dude shook things up. Electing a Black Dude again really shook things up. Electing a OWD that doesn't follow the OWD rules kept things shaking. That is why I feel like we should really shake things up in 2020. So I am seeking a Openly Transsexual Lesbian Asian Muslim Polygamist to run for the Utilitarian Party in 2020. Lets make America weird again!

Change Change this form of man Or Yup, that's scary

I have been labeled a Liberal and a Conservative by different people over the years. I've also been called a Troll and an Anarchist. In truth, people keep trying to slap some label on me to make me fit into their world but really when it all comes down to it I'm just an asshole. I say what I think and what I feel with very few buffers between where my brain starts and my mouth finishes. This tends to really honk a lot of people off and amuse an even larger number of people. I am perfectly okay with either outcome.

So ever since the Toupee that walks like a man was elected to be POTUS, I have seen a lot of “Never before in the history of history has a President and his family been subjected to (Insert your favorite horror here).” Having lived through the 8 years of Obama's regime, I personally find that statement extremely amusing and often wonder if people are stupid or simply suffering from some serious Dementia that effects their memories. However, the cries of outrage from Trumpservatives does have some minor echoes of reality in them, just not in the way they like to think. Sherman, set the Wayback Machine for about 10 years ago, please.

Now, in America's long and somewhat checkered history, one thing has pretty much remained a constant. No matter who was elected to be POTUS, they all had a couple of things in common. That's right, in the 45 different regime changes America has undergone, with two exceptions (Maybe three, just because I have a degree in history doesn't mean I actually know anything about it) these folks were all A. White and 2. Old. Okay, old is a relative term. They were well on their way to middle age even if they hadn't made it there yet.

So imagine it, in almost 250 years of existence, Americans almost always had an Old White Dude running things. One time, we had a young White Catholic dude running things and that upset some folks so much, he got killed. Still, even with the YWCD in charge, things were usually kind of civil. Sure we got snarky at times and even ugly a few more times, but for the most part, things went kind of smoothly. We almost never saw the level of hatred and vitriol that we have seen over the past 10 years. So what happened to change this?

Simple, the Status Quo got destroyed. Not just a little, but utterly and completely to the point of instilling mass panic, people hiding under beds and dogs sleeping with cats. (Well okay, maybe not the last one.) Note, what I am about to say it not meant to imply racism or even intolerance. It is just meant to show my point. The one true indicator that to most people's minds kept this country on a somewhat straight path was destroyed in one fell swoop. We elected a Black Man.

Ahh, I can hear the cries of outrage now. One side is saying, “We aren't racist! We didn't care if he was Black! He was just the Anti-Christ who invaded from Africa to make us all Gay Muslims!” The other side is saying, “Electing a Black Man was the first real sign that this country was moving away from the Dark Ages and into the Utopian Socialist Paradise that it was meant to be!” Well just calm down! This little rant has ZERO to do with racism and more to the fact that Americans are sticks in the mud who despise change. (That's better than being racist...right?)

So here is what happened. Election #1 occurs and a somewhat youngish Liberalish Black...ish man runs for the presidency! After over two centuries of Old White Dudes running (Ok Jesse Jackson did run that one time, but no one took him seriously), suddenly SOMETHING NEW happens. People on both sides get shook up and that is when the panic starts. Then HE ACTUALLY MANAGES TO GET ELECTED! That is when pretty much everyone hits DefCon1. Supporters of this radical new norm pull out all the stops defending him and opponents pretty much do the same thing.

So for the 4 years of the first round, all hell breaks loose because all of the “rules” both Liberals and Conservatives have lived by since the beginning are rendered null and void. Lies, insult, and threats previously considered improper and wrong are flung over and over again. Defensive lies and a laundry list of excuses are fired back. Suddenly our nice quiet lives were in the midst of an all-out battle of B.S. and quite simply, the majority of Americans didn't know how to deal with it so they just monkey piled on the side that seemed closest to the way they felt and hung on for dear life.

Towards the last half of the 1^st 4 years, things had actually started to quiet down a bit. The Right was steady in it's belief that soon another Old White Dude would be elected and things would return to the way they should be. Most of them weren't even concerned by which side won at this point, just that some OWD would win. The Left was mellowed out for pretty much the same reason. Either the Black Dude would win or another OWD would win so really they faced a Win/Win situation. Then, the unimaginable happens, at least from the viewpoint of the majority of Americans. The Youngish Black Dude wins again!

Again, keep in mind this really has almost nothing to do with BlackGOOD/ BlackBAD. Nothing to do with Racism...well okay almost nothing to do with racism. It is just that the nice simple worldview that pretty much all Americans had was once again busted into tiny little bits and tossed to hungry wolves so they could devour it completely. Our brains had been programmed by centuries of “well that is just the way things are” and once again we were shown that things could change. So the vitriol and lies that had faded were brought back with a vengeance.

During the second 4 years, we saw a level of rage and Meme making that hadn't ever been seen before in the history of Memes or Rage. People on both sides pulled out all of the stops and bombarded the entire world with Tweets, Twits, Snaps and...well pretty much everything else. Oh, the world trembled under the social media onslaught as everyone cried out in terror.

Now, you'd think that after the “norm” was returned that this would all die down. After all, we had two centuries of being fairly courteous and not going ape poop over whoever was elected to be the current American dictator. I mean if we could be somewhat human during Carter and Ford, then we should be able to return to that after the Scary Black Dude was gone, right? Well, there are to obstacles to that. One I will cover here and one I will cover in the next rant. The one I will cover here is a simple one.

Once the cat is out of the bag and the horse is out of the barn, it is practically impossible to get them back in again. (especially the cat, those suckers hate bags) Eight years was all it took for both sides to forget civility and the rules of engagement. Suddenly our lizard brains realized that we didn't actually HAVE to play nice. We realized that we could say or do whatever the hell we want no matter how horrible and cruel it was and nothing bad would happen. So yeah, an Old White (Orange?) Dude was elected President. Even better the OWD beat a WOMAN, (Not meant as sexist. Goes back to the 200+ years of OWD mentality.) but the rules of engagement had changed and there was no going back.

People hate change. Change scares people because they aren't sure how to deal with it. The longer things remain the same, the more scary change is. Even people who claim to want things to change often just want more of the same with just a different face. When Obama was elected, the way things always have been was destroyed and everyone is still just trying to find out where to go from here. No matter how much people may want things to go back to the way they were, it will never happen. Donald Trump is actually proof of that in his own way. (More on that in the next rant.)

America is changing. For the good or for the worse only time will tell. I won't even make a guess, but in my mind, any change is good in the long run. The change means chances at progress. Not changing means the doom of stagnation. Sure, shaking things up can be scary and perhaps even destructive, but forest fires are sometimes needed to clear out the old and useless deadwood and allow new growth to start.

The Blame Game or "We has met the enemy and he is us."

So we have had a horrific shooting where several journalists were shot and killed. A terrible event that underscores how violent and evil people can be. At this point, I am unsure which side of our so-called political spectrum I hate more. The extreme Left is screaming that this is all Trump's fault because Hair Furrer is constantly calling the press "Evil and The Enemy." The Extreme Right is screaming how the press brought this on themselves for spreading "fake news" and of course is shouting the usual "It musta been a Liberal or a Mooslem (Their spelling not mine) that done it."

So, here is my thoughtifying on the matter. Let's just say, for the sake of arguifying that Donnie Dumpsterfire's mindless rantings and badly articulated thoughts did indeed fuel the fires that led to this shooting. On the flip side, let's also pretend that the EVIL press type people (Waves at Ben Baker) pushed all the wrong buttons and goaded this shooter into acting to try and save the world. So, assuming that all of these things happened, where does the responsibility for the shooting lay. Hells, where does the responsibility for any of the shootings that occur way to often in the US lay...lie...laid? (Darn it!)

I can answer that badly garbled question fairly easy. Where does the responsibility...erm get dumped? Is it the POTUS and those darned Republicans fault? Is it the darned Liberals and Obama's fault? Nope, the fault lies in just one simple place that is easily found. The fault, dear friend, lies not with the Damnoobubitarians but with the shooter. (Bet no one gets that completely deranged literary reference!) That's right, Buttercups! The responsibility for these horrendous acts is the sole responsibility of the guy/guys pulling the triggers.

Yeah yeah, I know! It is a totally radical concept, this personal responsibility thing and most people really can't grasp it. I mean, the idea that someone could decide to do something, plot it out and undertake it all by themselves is mind-blowing. It is so much easier to believe that they were tricked into murdering a bunch of people by evil outside forces than to think they acted on their own. Actually thinking about it causes most people's headparts to go KABOOM!

Now, before anyone whines, I am not saying that outside forces cannot influence a person's decision to commit these acts. Unless you live in a magic vacuum world where you never interact with the outside world, you WILL be influenced. BUT (my god what a big but), influencing is not the same thing as forcing. See unless you are being controlled by Infrapink Baked Potato Rays (Or IBPR in the business) by the Pistachio (Cannot believe I spelled that right on the first try) Illuminati Triumvirate (or The Pits as we say in the business) and are nothing more than a mindless automaton following the orders of your Nutty Masters, you are responsible for your own actions. No one else, just you.

So yeah, the News/Pollytickans/Invisible Moonbeams from planet Q might have pushed you to commit a horrible crime (Like wearing pink stripes with blue polka dots. Brr, worst day of my life) However, in the end, each person is solely responsible for their own sins. Hypocritical name calling and finger pointing serves no purpose (Well except for giving me something to write about) and only serves to distract from the real problems. No good is served by marching in the blame parade and only helps those who have no interest in solving these problems stay in power.

In the future, instead of trying to figure out a way to blame “THOSE PEOPLE” we should work side by side (Yeah like that is going to happen) and try to fix the real problems. By fighting among ourselves, we are only allowing “THEM” to keep dividing us and maintaining control over us.

I (Awkwardly) SALUTE YOU! or "OMFG WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HERE!"

So Liberals are in an uproar over

Trump saluting an Enemy Officer during his NK visit. Screaming "treason!" and "SEE SEE! He likes enemies more than Americans!" The majority of them post the still photo that apparently shows him smartly saluting the (Ok I have to admit, I do like the guys uniform) officer. My problem isn't with Donnie saluting the dude. If you watch the actual video, you'll see that when the moment comes, Hair Furrer is completely and utterly confused at what to do. The dude salutes while Trump holds out his hand and Trump awkwardly salutes him back. It was obviously an "Oh crap what do I do" moment on the Toupee that walks like a man's part. If you watch the video, it was less of a "saluting the enemy' than it was "I have no idea what I doing" thing.

No, my problem is the hypocrisy of

the Right over the moment. They have already demonstrated it quite well by praising Trump's efforts in NK while forgetting how they completely eviscerated Obama over and over again when he even suggested that it should be done. Now, we have the salute. When Obama bowed to one of our ALLIES!!!, he was demonized over and over again by the RIght Wingnuts as being weak and betraying America by showing subservience. Faux News ran with that for months after the event. Now Hair Furrer is seen saluting an Enemy Officer and all of the Trumpublicans are defending him and coming up with exquisitely delusional reasons why this is COMPLETELY different from Obama bowing.

John McDuffie provided the most

perfect example of doublespeak on the matter. (In his defense, he was not aware of the actual event yet and was speaking in a more general nature, but his well-worded explanation pretty much mirrors all of the BS being spewed by others who actually knew what was going on. WTG John!)

Politics is filled with BS.

Politics is filled with hypocrisy. It is an occupational requirement. The very idea of a politician is a contradiction. A Politician MUST keep his vast numbers of supporters happy by making them insane promises that he has no real ability to keep and a Politician MUST do whatever he has to to keep his job even if that means screwing over the very people that elected him. It is only when people understand this simple fact that they realize that broadly defending one group while destroying the other groups is pointless and only serves to make things worse.

Every political group is guilty of this. None of them are innocent. The only way any of this will change is if we stop this insane partisan blind support of "Our" side and realize that we are all in this badly damaged boat rapidly sinking in a sea of manure together and start patching the holes and draining the crap. To quote a director that I never really liked, "WAKE UP!" Because if you don't wake up soon, you're going to need to learn how to breath bull poop.

Birthday 55 countdown 363 or Don't just stand there! THEY'RE GOING TO WIN!

 For the most part I have stayed out of the circus that is the current hullabaloo over the recent school shooting and the uproar that has erupted since then. Instead I have simply sat back and watched as the (mostly) Conservative and Libertarian friends on Facebook made complete and utter fools out of themselves and proved their hypocrisy (waves at John McDuffie and Chaz Carsten) and the smaller number who have proven that they are completely ignorant and more than a little bit bigoted. (No names here, this is a family piece) The reasons for this are two fold. I don't usually make commentary either here or on social media unless 1. I actually have ideas about how to solve the problem, 2. I have something in the form of semi-clever or snarky comments to make about the subject and 3. I have actually been in just too good a mood to even bother. (Wait....1...2...3? Meh sue me, math was never my strong suit. In reality, the only strong commentary I made was right after the shooting when the student protests were first starting to get fired up. It was a simple one and I thought it was very clever. I will share it with you here so that you too can appreciate my cleverness....or mock me in hopefully clever ways.

As I have stated before, I don't have an answer to the horrors going on with mass shootings. I am not in the fairly small sub groups of A. TAKE ALL GUNS AWAY or 2. WE NEED TO GIVE GUNS TO EVERYONE! ESPECIALLY BABIES! Like most things in life (except for coffee of course) I believe that if there is an answer, it has to be in moderation. It must exist somewhere in the middle between the two loud groups which you see going on and on on TV and social media. But here is the kicker to me at least as far as getting people to support your idea. It is two simple words that will make you the hero of the hour in the eyes of the world. Ready? It is gonna blow your mind! Here it is. DO SOMETHING! Huh, what do I mean? It's not self explanatory? Okay, onwards with explainifying things then!

People, especially Americans are a fairly simple people. Easily distracted and easily tricked. I mean, come on! They elected Donald “Dumpsterfire” Trump to be POTUS for gosh's sake! He ran on a fairly empty and air headed platform with about as much substance as ghost poop. Anyone with any common sense can see he is woefully inadequate for the job. He was elected because he was loud and outspoken and at least pretended to want to make things different for America. People elected him because he pretended to want to fix everything that they thought was wrong with the country. All flash and no substance, but he convinced people that he would change things. Right now, people are angry. People are scared. People are...well kind of creepy, but that is beside the point. The Right is convinced that the Left is coming to take away their fully automatic, triple barreled machine flame throwers and the Left is convinced that the Right is planning on staging an armed rebellion against any state that doesn't serve Sweet Tea on buffets. “News” on both sides are sitting back and fanning the flames and politicians are tap dancing on the fence waiting to see which side to jump on.

So here is my suggestion and it is really not complicated. Do something. If your group is convinced that requiring DNA testing and an oath signed in blood in front of Elvis is the only way people should be allowed to own a gun and that the government should place secret alien tracking micro chips (That is tracking micro chips of alien design, not tracking chips designed to track aliens. That is a whole nother rant) in each bullet, then GO FOR IT! Rick Scott (Didn't see that one coming) and Florida of all places have passed stronger gun regulations and have earned accolades from the Left for taking steps to better regulate guns. More states and more politicians need to be convinced that this is the way to go if you think that guns are the problem.

Now if you feel that laws are for sissies and that regulations are the work of the devil, then go for it. If you think that the answer is to put .50 caliber anti aircraft guns at the doors to every school and to give all the teachers hand grenades, then start passing laws on state and Federal levels that will do exactly that. Heck have heavily armed flying drones orbiting every school in America just to make sure.

Whenever these horrible shootings occur events follow a fairly simple pattern. For a few weeks after the event, one side screams for stronger gun laws and more restrictions and the other screams about making schools safer by putting armed guards in them or arming the teachers. And up until now, once the uproar is over, nothing ever happens. EVER. The Right's cries for armed guards and such simply evaporate away because no one actually wants to spend any money on the solutioon. The Left's outrage vanishes like Trump facing a porn star because, in the end, no one in power really wants to be seen as pushing for restrictions on the 2^nd Amendment. So the talk dies out and people forget until the next mass shooting and then the dance starts up all over again.

 This time, the signs are there that things might just get done. Now whether these things are a good thing or a bad thing is beyond my fairly limited ability to predict, but it seems like a crucial point may have been reached where people are just too sick and tired to let talking be all that happens. So, if you really don't want THEM to win, then you and our so called leaders had better get up off their butts and do something. No more noise, no more smoke and mirrors. It is time for actions. If y'all don't act, then it is entirely possible that THEY (Ominous music inserted here) will win and that will mean the END of your way of life (Picturing a deep organ sound here like someone laid down on the keys really heavy.) It is time to put up or be shut out. Better get to work!

CLINTON SUCKS!

No real blog here, just conducting a little social experiment.

TRUMP SUCKS!

No real blog here, just conducting a little social experiment.